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by Patty Berube

I’ve been contemplating for a while about modesty. A lot of people think about modesty in terms of fashion. I really don’t like some of the current fashion where t-shirts and dresses aren’t in style unless you can see cleavage. But then again I wore mini-skirts and hot pants (oops, my age is showing), so who am I to judge what young girls wear? And now my generation is starting to wear cleavage-revealing tops too, so I imagine the fashion will soon be out of style! That seems to be the way of it – as soon as the adults follow a trend it becomes “so last year” (I think that expression is now out of date too.)

But modesty is more than fashion – modesty is a way of living – without boasting, without ostentation. A modest person doesn’t need to blow his or her own horn; doesn’t need to be looked upon as an exciting person or celebrity. Modest people don’t feel the need to brag about accomplishments, they just do what they need to do, often excel at what they do, and let their actions speak for them. They live more simply and have accommodations that meet their needs rather than to impress others.

These days it seems that everyone has to “sell” themselves. Resumes have to be padded with accomplishments and activities or they don’t get past the gatekeeper. If you don’t brag about your activities in social media, then you’re just another boring person. Young families have to strive to buy bigger, impressive homes or have more vehicles than their neighbours.

But is it the person who always has to be “on top” or the person who is accomplishing exciting things the one you respect the most? Is it the young family in debt up to their ears with the boats and the exciting winter vacations that you want to be like? Not me. I wish my grandchildren modest, simpler lives – homes that they can afford, careers that give them satisfaction, and respect that is earned from actions, not boasting.

You have a good many little gifts and virtues, but there is no need of parading them, for conceit spoils the finest genius. There is not much danger that real talent or goodness will be overlooked long, and the great charm of all power is modesty.
~ Louisa May Alcott

Patty grew up in Edmonton, Alberta but has lived in the Okanagan since 1989. For the last 23 years, Patty has been an employee of Wood Lake Publishing Inc., President since January of 2014. Being a Grandmother and Great-Grandmother are Patty’s greatest prides. Her passions include reading, baking, gardening, and loving her rescue pets.